RAW INDIE: MOVIE REVIEWS/INTERIORS/STYLE

CAMPUS MAN (1987)

Campus Man was an accident find... a random pull from a a random row of video paradise.As I pulled it, my buddy Joe goes "MY DADS IN THAT!!"

I laughed and was like what?! "No serious." So of course it had to be rented for laughs and nostalgia.

After he showed me a scene of his dad's spectacular mustache as one of the ASU dive teams judges...I took it home to later watch it in its entirety...

and I must say the only thing great about that movie is my friend's dads spectacular mustache.

The movie is basically about a guy who I kept thinking was homeboy from weekend at Bernies/ MANNEQUIN(aka Andrew McCarthy), trying to raise money for tuition. Sadly the guy was not Bernie Mannequin...it was some dude named john from Touched by an Angel. His acting was terrible. he should have been touched by an acting class.

His characters name was Todd...Todd decides to make a beefcake calendar of male athletes to sell to help pay for tuition. I personally think he shoulda just went on supermarket sweeps because the shirts he was wearing throughout this damn thing screamed pastel sweatshirt super market sweep contestant.

To make this said calendar he needed a loan... so he finds loan shark Reno Raines Renegade in a desert biker side of town. Loan Shark man wasn't the real lorenzo llamas ,but he had a very similar mane and it would have been way cooler if it was.

Meanwhile, a magazine agency discovers the calendar and Morgan Fairchild appears determined to sign a contract with one of the male swimmers

who in her mind would be the ideal spokesperson/image of the "perfect man of the 80s" they want to feature.

The only problem though.. this contract f***s with the tournament eligibility of diver Brett, Todd's friend,who channels a zack morris steve sanders ken doll look. turrable. They didnt know this at first..so to get out of said contract they stage a fake arrest after pretendingto be running an illegal ring of collegiate grade changing on computer screens of black and green.

Morgan Fairchild sees this then rips the contract up in pieces saying WHYYYYY GODWHYYYYYYY!!! WE CANT USE THIS MAN AS A 80s STUDD MUFFIN ROLE MODEL IN OUR PUBLICATION!!!!!WHYYYYYYYY!! GAWWWW!

(she really doesnt say that)

In the end, mr renegade, somehow appears and becomes "ideal 80s mans cover boy". then randomly makes out with morgan fairchild. then everyone is happy. and the movie ends.

ps. joes dads mustache wins the dive contest.

GHOULIES (1984)

so there's a evil man that does rituals and he was goin to sacrifice his son, but when he tried to, the son set of an electrical burst and the evil man goes TAKE HIM AWAY then sacrifices his special babymakin lady friend instead.

Fast foward,the son grows up inheriting a house and is moving in it

with his girlfriend. He starts exploring the house and finding ritual books, robes, etc... and gets sucked into it eventually weirding out his friends and girlfriend.

He then calls forth two dwarves, but really he should have called forth Warwick Davis. He calls upon these demons to mind warp his girlfriend and friends to come back and hang among his weird glowing eyes and witchcraft/darklord behavior. They are all wearing a bunch of new wave sunglasses at the dinner

table, but there are no DAY-o banana boat song dance routines that occur.

Instead they separate and one by one get attacked by ghoulies.

I was disappointed that all these ghoulies didn't live in the toilet

as the cover suggests. I thought they'd be popping out of toilets left and right.

I thought they'd be toilet demons. just nothing but toilet demons. Instead they were randomly scattered throughout the property demons. these demons were no longer being controlled by the son, for his father returned from the grave and interrupted the new wave shade wearin party.

Some of the green ghoulies were evil slimer cute,

others gross, the clown ghoulie was the best.

This was the best line of the movie:

I like to call that guy Gas Station Dennis (which is an inside joke)

He gets killed by the lady demon with a giant tongue that chokes him to death. That's what he gets for being sleazy greasy.

Sorority Babes in the

Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama (1988)

This movie oozed in cheesiness...which makes it kind of great. Felta-Delta babes..were told by their leader to sneak into a bowling alley and steal a trophy....along with the revenge of the nerd lookin frat dudes who were caught spying on the pledges

Somehow out of nowhere kelly bundys wardrobe appears ..punk glam spandex was there stealin quarters from the arcade games (she just really wanted a diet coke)she ends up being the one, along with revenge of the nerdy saving the day at the end

Chaos begins when the evil IMP trapped in the trophy escaped and

acted as a genie granting wishes...The wishes go horribly wrong and the deltas

turn evil and look like they could star in the total eclipse of the heart music vid

They start attacking the nerds and the creepy owner of the bowling alley.

In the End the Imp with the brotha accent gets trapped in some kind of can & then spandex and nerdy drive away on a tiny bike mo-ped to live happily ever after.

INTERIORS